Online Poker, is this really poker?

You know what comparison I want to make right now? A pretty far out one that you all make feel makes no sense but I'm going to go ahead and make it. Online poker compared to live poker is a sorry excuse for what poker truly is, it's just simulated poker, you don't want to go out and find real poker games with living breathing beings with emotions that you can see with your own eyes. So you stay home and play it on your computer and it's not the real thing and if you do it to much it just sucks. The same way people who can't get layed but want some form of sexual satisfaction use that very same machine they use for online poker to handle their business down there. Wouldn't you rather be close to real live girl and really touch her as oppossed to just looking at videos of one and touching yourself! How retarded is it to use your computer for this shit as oppossed to going out there and finding a real girl? Just as retarded as using your computer to play poker. There I said it, playing live poker is live actually having sex and playing poker online is like jerking yourself off and then crying yourself to sleep.
Yesterday I made like 100 something dollars online and then stopped playing because I just don't care anymore. COMPUTER SIMILATION IS NOT REAL LIFE! Just thought I'd throw that in there. And today I was playing a little bit online dreading it the whole time, I made a quick hundred then bluffed off 100 bucks because I care about getting someone to lay something down once in their life against me alot more than 100 bucks. I then took a break and won 100 back playing some completely irrational tilted kid who kept going all in for 85 dollars everytime I raised before the flop. I also staked my friend to play some 25 max cash games and he lost some of the money I sent him so I finished up 60 for the day, pretty bad. You know what I don't care! (Staking is when you give another poker player the buyin for a game and when he wins he pays you back plus half the profit, if he loses you lose)
I used to play online till I made 200-250 a day and I wouldn't quit till then. I have no desire to do this anymore. Even though that was making me good money it just doens't seem worth it anymore. I'm just back home right now to sell my car, I can't just live here and play online anymore its not a very fulfilling life. I get much more joy out of working on this site as oppossed to playing online, which I used to really fiend for. I just wanna live somewhere that I can play live and I'll just have online poker on the back burner, available if I ever need it. If I really have to sit on my computer and deal with these fronters and probe betters any longer I'm going to jump off a building.
It's weird though, when I was in AC for too long live poker got a little frustrating. Sort of to the same extent that online is now. I don't know maybe I'm just complaining, if I was on you regular people who have to use alarm clocks I would be worse off. I'm glad I have not invested in any kid of property or a signed a lease around here where the only was to pay it off was to play online or get a real job because I have no casinos around. That would be bad. But even if I owned something in Atlantic City would I feel like I'm in over my head because it's just a matter of time before to much live poker drives me insane as well? It's just being a professional poker player in general it a very unique and mind bending way to go about making a living and I can see this now. In college all I did was wish I was out so I could start playing, but now it's not all that. I still love poker though, overall I don't want to do anything else. When I'm not playing I feel like I don't have any purpose.
However I have heard several very accomplished pros talk very honestly about what they do. Like Eric Seidel who has been around since forever and is a perfect example of what I strive to be in life said "I wouldn't really recommend it" when asked about playing as a career and he has won millions! I heard John D'agostino say "I started playing so much that I decided to play for a living. Not something I would really recommend, it's a tough way to make an easy living" And Mike Matusow always rips on the profession and says how sick in the head he is and how lucky the ones who have sponsors are and if he didn't have sponsorship he would never want to be a pro. Well thats me, JoeBlow Grinder, no sponsorship, completely unknown with no other way to have an income then flat out taking people's cash at the table. And poker will always be misunderstood by people who don't play and have a negative stigma attached to it. No one in my entire family has ever helped me suceed as a poker player. They all refuse to give me any sort of loan because they think I'm just going to lose everything. It's really pretty disheartening. All these family games we play all I do is rake in the dough and call out people's exact hole cards with the same frequency of Negreanu himself but they still won't give me anything. I could really use a loan of 10 grand or so and it would be so easy for me to really thrive as a player, but they don't even know about money management they think I'm gonna play with all of it at once because there ignorant. The whole situation really really hurts.
Nevertheless I don't care what anyone says, being a poker player, I wouldn't have it any other way. Well yes I would I'd rather be a famous player who plays in all the major events and is sponsored, but I'd still rather be me than one of you regular people, no offense meant if you like what you do for a career good for you. I just feel I am the only one who is truly free. You may live in a free country and not be behind bars but you still answer to somebody, you still live on a restricted time schedule, not for me people. I always want to be truly free and self employed.
I've talked to a number of friends about moving somewhere and getting a place together but no one wants to live where I want to and I never want to live where they do. How can I live somewhere like North Carolina or even a place close to home and inherit a bunch of responsibility with no casinos available? Sounds like a disaster to me. I can't live like that, and that much online poker will give me an ulser or two. Money really is not the issue I wanna move now! But no one will move to AC or Vegas that I know and going alone is just crazy, but I might have to. Cause I really refuse to play online any more than I've been lately. If there is anyone who reads this post who is a poker player or anything I don't care but you wanna move to a casino type area contact me asap! I'm going to be home till I sell my car and then I'm just going to leave. No place for me here, that last trip to AC really made me wonder why I ever left.........