ITS OFFICIAL

Okay, I really think I may be completely insane. At this point I think its official. Last night I went crazy again playing online. Started the day sitting on 140. End with 69. I kinda wanna just never play poker again. I could take the 69 dollars I have an start playing smart again and it will eventually be 140 again, and then 200. And then 500 and so on. But shit, I'm always risking the possibility that I go comepletely insane again. I don't even wanna play today, I just wanna sell my fuckin car. I may have a buyer lined up, but I expect something to go wrong. He'll find something else, or change his mind, I don't know. Hopefully things work out.
I threw off my sleep schedule and I believe thats why I went crazy last night. When you wake up and don't even see any daylight, its hard to sit down and be disciplined. I remember back when I had money, this sort of thing occuring.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Damn.... what happened?

Pretty much the same kind of post. I get up during the night, and then my opponents were just really pissing me off. And I have a Mike Matusow blow up. I'm gonna be playing low stakes forever at this point. I really do make good money when I'm not going insane. What can I do to keep myself sane at all times. I think I need to prevent this sleep schedule foul up from ever happenning again. Starting tomorrow I'm going to start sticking to a schedule, so I can ensure I'll always be up during the day and asleep at night.

11-12 am- wake up, drink coffee, make breakfast, eat fish oil (pills that make u smart)

12pm-2pm- run the treadmill, stretch out, lift some shit, relax

2pm-6pm play online poker

630pm- eat dinner

7pm- 9m Blog, post hand of the day on hand replayer, Write

9pm- 3am- eat fish oil, chill

3am- eat fish oil, sleep

Gonna try this shit out tomorrow, gonna use an alarm clock, set it for 11am and sleep till 12 if I want. I used to say my goal in life was to never use an alarm clock and still make money, I'm seeing now that it can't really work that way. I guess what really pissed me off last night once this one guy in the first sit and go I played. He would just raise every hand and bet every flop, and you kinda just had to let him win. Because he would call everything. Theres nothing you can do about a player like this. Like if you reraised him because you know he had nothing, which was obvious, he would call with whatever garbage he had. he called my all in with KJsuited. He called this other guys all in with a flush draw when he had nothing invested in the pot. How can you defeat a player like this? If you have nothing, and he bets every flop and calls everything? I just don't know what to do against this type. Ya see there is really nothing you can do because there the comacozzi type. They don't care if they lose. If you decide to raise the because you know they have shit, they're gonna call anyway. So unless you have something, you kinda just have to let em win. Its really sick...........
It was also pretty sick when I used jsut 15 dollars to play someone headsup and was up to 30. This guy rebuys for another 20, later on I had 25 and he had 25 and then I flopped a straight with Q10 as the flop came AKJ. I bet and he moves all in with a pair of jacks. The turn and river comes J, J. Giving him four of a kind jacks. So my 15 should been turned into 50, but it was turned into 0 after that suckout. On the flop, when all the money went in, his chance of winning was 3 out of 100. So my 97% favorite didn't hold up........ (sighs, shakes head)

If I can sell this car and have some pocket change I won't care how low of stakes I have to play as long as I keep growing. Lets pray everything works out and then I can get things going again and be moved out of my house in a few months.
I often fear I am running out of time. In 5 years I will be 30. I don't wanna be that old. I need to get things in order now, before I'm old and its too late.