Time Travel and Boredom

Two subjects that can both exist or not exist depending on how you look at them. I guess this is more true for boredom. The time travel question probably has a more concrete answer. It either does, or does not exist and most likely does not.
Boredom is really not clearly defined and it's impossible to say whether your actually bored or not. There are levels of boredom, and some may call being only mildly entertained bored, and others might only call being bored having nothing to do but what they do normally. And I would call bored having literally no options but to just sit there. It's not clearly defined what boredom is cause no one knows what level of boredom you must reach to technically be considered bored.
But you can be bored with a particular subject. Lately I feel I am relatively bored with poker and do not necessarily feel the same way about it I once did. But there are still aspects of the game I love very much that do not depart.
For instance I want you to check out this video clip.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qp6EB1r0Hj4 (fast forward to minute 2:00)

Joe Hachem makes an excellent play here. Through watching how the betting goes, he is able to gather enough information about Howard Lederers hand to know that he does not have the ace of spades. And he is able to take the pot away from Howard and profit with the worst hand. This is a very nifty move and requires deep thinking. If Howard is an amateur donkey Hachem can not win this pot. It just shows how awsome poker is because when good players are against eachother the entire dynamic of the game changes and your thought process goes much much deeper.
Props to Joe Hachem for performing well and going with his gut, making a very sophisticated bluff that requires very deep thinking. Ya see people who don't follow poker religiously don't really understand who is a good player. Television gives the general public a distorted view of what poker really is. Showing mostly tournaments as oppossed to real poker, otherwise known as cash games.
If you watch all the high stakes poker episodes you will see that Daniel Negreanu is far from what an average poker viewer believes he is. He does not excel with the most important aspects of being good at real poker. Which is patience and steam control. The ability to lose hands, lose money, through the inevitable swings and still maintain your A game is a stranger to Daniel. TILT. The tilt monster has him bad. He is a great tournament player, one of the best, top 5 easy. But cash games, or real poker is just to brutal for him.
There are many "TV" players that people think are good, but you have to know who suceeds at real poker to really know whats going on. Now Joe Hachem was your typical candidate to be a "TV" player, but so far it looks like he can play real poker quite well. There is a lot more to come and we will see, but so far so good. I was very impressed with how he won that hand with no spade.
An example of players people think are good at poker but are really just "TV" players:

Sammy Farha (he's just a rich guy) Eli Elezra (a really really rich guy) Chris Moneymaker (plays tournaments well, not much else) Jamie Gold and Jerry Yang (two previous Main Event Winners who do not have the discipline to suceed at cash games or real poker at this point in time)

Not all TV players are necessarilly bad at real poker, but its mostly unknowns who are really the best players. The guys you should fear are the internet youngens. They've played more hands than anyone. These are the few people I can see myself honestly not being able to beat even if I was playing with money I am comfortable losing.

People you do not want to see at your table:

Barry Greenstein, Tom Dwan, Phil Ivey, Patrick Antonius, hate to leave anyone out, theres others.

Anyway remember, its never what it seems. Many a hater has told me I suck at poker because I have been broke at times. This is simply quick accusations that have not been thought out. Its the same kind of people who do not think of poker as a game of skill but just another gambling game like anything else in the casino.
Its relying solely on poker and not havin any other source of income that has cause financial woes, not how I play. But if I'm talking to someone I don't know to well, I just know they think the worst. Just think of it this way, I have played a lot of poker, and a lot of underbankrolled which is an immediate disadvantage. I have still come out ahead a lot, just not enough to sustain the expenses of living.
And think of it this way, if someone else has played as many hours as me, think about how heavily in debt they would be. I am not in debt, just stuck at zero. Cause for the majority of time I had no other source of imcome, and have spent what I have made.
But no one thinks deeper, just hears 'poker' and assumes the worst, its unfortunate. Perception is reality for to many of us. We all need to learn to think deeper, and not make quick judgements. Its never what it seems.
For example: One time I was standing with a friend in law of mine at a gas station.
(friend in law: friend of a friend, not necessarilly your friend)
So we see this hot chick walk inside. And I say "Hi Christina" to her. She does not smile and say hi back or anything. Just gives us a dirty look and flicks her cigerette to the ground right at our feet and then say "sup" in a real bitchy tone.
I'm standing there thinking "Wow what a stuck up bitch!!!!!!!" Just thought I'd say high since she went to highschool with me, what the hell?
So I just assume she is a bitch and forever in my mind she is a stuck up hoe who can't even say hi after I go out of my way to be nice. Little did I know the whole story. Soon after I find out that the kid stading there next to me, my friend in law was at a party with with her the night before and was calling a dirty slut and the C word in front of all these people.
So obviously her attitude was all directed toward him and had nothing to do with me. If it was just me there it all would of been different. But I would assumed the worst about her for the rest of my life if I hadn't found out the truth of the night before.
So from now, never accept anything at face value, there always more to it, always. The only person who know is yourself, you don't have the right to ever make a judement on anyone.
How many times have I gone one about how I would like have more money to play poker so I wanna sell my car or maybe get a job, or do some free lance work. Sure when I was broke I have said this, but I've also said it while I still had money. And when people would here me say this they would automatically assume I just blew everything I have playing poker and now I need more. What I actually mean is that I want to increase my overall bankroll size so that 5% of my bankroll is actually a larger sum, so that I can withstand the swings of my current stakes better, therefore continuing to use my mathematical advantage to earn more profits.
But what do people assume? Oh he's selling everything like a crack fiene so he can gamble more and will eventually be in the same postion. I do not wish to associate with anyone who takes perception as reality.
I consider myself a poker sucess because I am a relatively large amount based on the low stakes I have played. I am a winning real poker or cash game player. My overall time in Atlantic City playing real poker has yielded me a considerable hourly rate (20/hr) when most people have not only not profited, but are way down. I am barely a winner from online poker, but still 92% of online players are down. I have kept records all my life, but don't have one complete record from when I started in 2004. I know I am up like 5-6grand from AC. I know I was up like 2 grand early college days from home games. I know I've gotten like 6 grand in checks from pokerstars, but may have deposited like 3 grand. And I was down like 2 grand in college from online. My records are scattered and incomplete info, but somewhat helpful, much like poker itself. A game of incomplete info and then gathering as much as you can making the best decision. So honeslty, since 2004, if I was to give a modest estimate, I'd say I was up like 8 grand, and a generous estimate maybe 13 grand. Defiantely not less or more than those two guesses.
Pretty good compared to how low of stakes I've played. But not that good considering its since 2004. I would honestly be up a lot more if I had the right bankroll the whole time and if everyone in my life didn't constantly refuse to believe it really is a game of skill and neglect to support me.
I have been a victim of tilt, but that is directly related to bankroll issues and negative pressure. I don't regret anything with poker, I wouldn't be the player I am today without having been so obsessed with it that I refused to work for so long. If I could travel through time I would not change anything. But I often regret so many decisions I have and am always wishing for a time machine.
The first thing I think is going back to college and attempting to court BBL with a different approach. There is no way I would ever go further back because then the events that led me to cross her path might change and I may never have met her. But if I did have the chance to go back whatever approach I took probly would not work. If it was meant to work it would of. She would find a way to be difficult no matter what I did. If I could go back I would definately do everything I wanted to do but didn't cause I was afraid I would lose her. If I knew I would lose her anyway the whole time, the experience would be better. There are certain deep regrets I wish I could redo.
And then I'm always wishing I could go back to last year and never have quit my job. Could play poker and work and rake in the dough. I only worked 4 days a week, I had it made. But didn't realize it at the time. But even though I wish for time travel just to change that. I still wish for time travel to change things that happenned after. Which shows that maybe I don't need to change that.
For all the wishing for time travel so I never quit my job, I find myself wishing I never left AC a few months after I quit my job. When I had that one bad week after so many good weeks, why did I leave? I was frustrated at the time, and went home. Why didn't I just get a job and stay. Everything would of been fine. If all my friends eventually do not live around here anymore, why even be around here? Mine as well just stay in AC then.
But now thats not happenning anymore cause I'm committed to running this cafe. Now I'm difenately stuck in Mahopac for a while. So now I wish I could time travel again to go back and stay in AC. But at the time I left AC I was wishing I never quit my job.
Thats why I'm doing this cafe, cause its the first time I'm sacrificing right now and trying to see into the future. I know financially it is the best thing. And I know I won't look back and wish I had did it, because I'm doing it. And if it does go really well I'm gonna be loaded.
That has to be a better decision than continuing to grind out a living whether its work or poker.
True, but why do I kinda wish I never left AC? I really loved playing everyday, playing live. I was really doing well for a while. For all the talk about leaving hometown, never seems to happen.
I just hope I feel the same way when I'm 28 as I do now, by then I hope to have the financial resources to really do what I want with poker. Like travel the entire world and go everywhere, play eveywhere, win money everywhere. Just cause AC is away from home doesn't mean your not still limiting yourself if you just stay there.
Working my ass off to get this place to be a profitable source of income or franchised, just has to be the right choice. I'm not gonna keep wishing I could go back..........